My kid is engaged. No, no: it’s not what you think. Let me explain. We’ve had a minor hiccup in J’s college search process recently: he has decided not to pursue music long-term. A couple of years ago he was definitely planning to major in music and then when we started having deeper discussions about what kinds of music careers he would want to pursue, he eventually changed his plan to Music Education and then, most recently, a business major with a music minor. Two weeks ago he announced out of the blue during one of our many college conversations that music was out. It was a shocker to us,…
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Mountain Time
I have never been a mushy-gushy type of mom: it’s just not me. I have never worried about my kids as much as other moms do. When my boys used to hurt themselves as little ones tend to do when they’re young and clumsy (or don’t make the best decisions!), I was pretty good at remaining calm and not worrying myself into the stratosphere. Where other moms can’t sleep until their teenager gets home in the evening–no matter how late it is–I have always been the “I’m going to bed: just wake me up when you get home so I know you made it back” type. I’m especially thankful to…
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Good Riddance, Junior Year!
I took this picture of J way back in August on the first day of Junior year. I wish I had known that morning when I admonished him for making that face (“Come on, give me a smile or something!”) that the face he gave me–one of sarcastic annoyance with a touch of “Are we done yet?”–would be a 100% accurate representation of the year as a whole, because perhaps I wouldn’t have given him such a hard time. (Perhaps.) Junior year sucks, and has sucked. It was the same with D, and although I can’t claim to know that Junior year sucks for every Junior and his or her…
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There Are Definite Disadvantages To Having A Tall Kid
On Tuesday at 6:30 a.m. I was in my usual spot on the couch, typing away on my laptop. Seventeen-year-old J, who was getting ready for school and had been in the kitchen just a moment before–presumably eating his breakfast–entered the room. I looked up as he walked towards me, and noticed the huge grin on his face. He said, “You will NEVER guess what I found!” Without allowing me even a second to give it a shot, he held his hand out to me. In his palm were two Hershey’s Eggs. Easter candy. It’s like gold around here. He sat on the couch next to me and scooted over…
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The Apple Doesn’t Fall Far From The Tree
It seems like only yesterday that I was waxing poetic about sending D off to college, and yet in two weeks he will finish his sophomore year. He is very, very happy at his school–which is a great relief to us, knowing that he made the right selection–and it’s been an exciting time for him. At the beginning of this semester, he decided to do something he claimed at the beginning of freshman year he had absolutely zero interest in doing: pledge a fraternity. We were relieved that he chose a fraternity that has a strict no secrets, no hazing policy, and it’s one whose members include the majority of…
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Teen Interpretation Gone Wrong
Seventeen-year-old J came home from his after school job and found me upstairs in my room, putting away laundry*. I asked him about school and work and then we talked about family plans for the weekend. He mentioned that his girlfriend wanted to know if he was busy tonight. I said, “I don’t know. Are you? All I need for you to do tonight is put away your laundry.” He said, “Okay, I’ll find out if she wants to hang out and…” His text notification went off and he looked at his phone. “Yep, she wants to hang out. So I guess I’m going to put away my laundry, make…
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Mother Knows Best
Let me preface my story by saying that of course I don’t enjoy when my children–or any of my loved ones, for that matter–get hurt. I just want that to be clear because I don’t want my readers to get the impression that my smug satisfaction with the events I am about to retell have anything to do with my child’s pain and suffering. Now, on with the story. I came home last night after teaching my spin class and went into the kitchen after passing through the family room and saying hello to J, who was sitting in the chair watching television. Jim was in the kitchen, and in…
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Inside The Life Of A Teenager
We don’t see a whole lot of J these days. Like many teenagers, his waking hours are full of commitments that keep him out of the house (and when he’s home, out of the family room), starting very early in the morning. On weekdays, he gets up around 5:30 a.m. to shower. He’s outside starting his car by 6:30. He picks up his best friend on his way to school. High school begins at 7:20. High school ends at 2:25. He drops his best friend off at home before heading straight for work. He works from about 3:00 until 5:30 each weekday (except for what he calls “No Work Wednesdays!”).…
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Transitions, Part Two
Yesterday I wrote about D’s return to college, and how different it feels this year compared to last. There are some changes where J is concerned, too. He has just begun his junior year in high school, which is really hard to believe in itself, so let’s all just pause for a moment to think about that. *pause* At the beginning of June, J got his first real job, working for an internet-based company. The owners of the company, a husband and wife, are members at our temple and gave him a chance for the summer, even though they were initially looking for a college student. J jumped right in…
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Personality Plus
The younger boy cracks me up. Usually. During the last couple of many months, he has been acting the part of a very normal teenager: spending lots of time in his room and not so much with us, attached to one of many technology items (sometimes more than one at at time) we have in the house. We’ve had to make major efforts to have actual discussions that delve deeper than: “How was your day?” “Good.” …and it’s not always easy to find that time, what with four of us running in different directions most of the time. When we can pin him down, though–like at the dinner table, for…